This post was recently inspired by Andrea of ABC Creativity. Ever since we left for our honeymoon I have been CONSUMED by money woes. I really just got tired of it. Saw this conversation in Andrea's blog and decided to give it a try myself. It's amazing the difference it made for me. 

Me: Hey fear. I wanna talk. I woke up this morning with you were harassing me about money & frankly I'm tired of it. I mean, I'm on my honeymoon & all you can talk about is why I shouldn't be. What's up with that?

Fear: Well. You SHOULDN'T BE! Think about all those bills at home waiting to be paid. With all the money you are spending and had to BORROW to be on this trip - you could of had most of them paid off. WTF?!

Me: I hear you & it would feel pretty great to have some of those bills paid and put away. But if I never went on vacation because I had a bill due - I would never get to go anywhere. I think life is about the experiences you have. And I'd much rather have memories of vacations than memories of only ever paying bills. The problem is, I'm ruining my vacation by paying attention to YOU. 

Fear: What do you expect me to do? Walk away? Leave you here with your fun, friends & gratitude - why on Earth would I do that when I am the only one thinking responsibly about YOUR bills. You need me here to keep you in line & remind you of what's important. 

Me: To remind me of what's important? Okay. Let me think back to the other 3 specifice times I can remember you talking smack in similar situations: Port Aransas 2008, Turner Falls 2009, Port Aransas 2009, Arizona 2010, Seattle 2010 - and yet, here we are once more. You saying the same blah, blah thing & me feeding into it. 

Fear: Think about all the horrible things that could happen to you if forget about your bills!

Me: The worst possible thing that could happen to me, would be that 1) money would stop coming to me and The Mister. 2) we would have our electricity & phones turned off and 3) the creditors start calling for my car payment. What would I do if any of these things happened? 1.) Find a job to create some income until we get back on our feet & I can keep doing Soul Sessions and eCourses. 2) I would call the phone and electric company and set up a payment plan so our services can stay on until I get the money to pay them. and 3.) Tell them my money situation and see how they might help me. Again - this is worst case scenario, Fear. 

Fear: Those things can be scary. But they all seem to have some kind of resolved out come. Maybe I am over reacting. 

Me: Perhaps just a little. I mean, I came all this way & found the money to do it - shouldn't I enjoy what I have manifested? Won't the bill still be there when I get back? Yes. They will. One thing that WOULD make me feel better in this moment is to see what I can do NOW to take action with these bills. Do what I can and then let go. Yes, that feels nice. 

Fear: Le sigh. I guess I'll go back to sleep now. 

Me: Thanks for the reminder, but I got this. 

If you want to try this out for yourself, notice if you experience resistance around the exercise & push through it. Believe me the end result is a lot less scary than writing it out. 

During the ROOTED Intensive we will be working through money woes & blocks. This is one of the categories the new exercises will fall under. I hope to see you there - July 18th. 

On Sunday I had friend return a book of mine that I let her borrow a while back. You might know it, it's called A Return to Love.

I was so thrilled to have this book back in my possession that I went back to reading it right away. 

Since I've read all of the book before, I just picked the chapter I most wanted to read - it happened to be Work - personal power. My favorite quote from this section is...

Beautiful huh? Makes you feel powerful, doesn't it? 

That is just how I went to bed feeling on Sunday night. Powerful.

So much so that I found the strength to surrender once more my life, business, marriage, my honeymoon - everything. It felt good letting go the reins and handing them over to someone with much more experience & know-how. 


Monday - the car
The big task I had to tackle on Monday was renting a car. I thought this was going to be a breeze, but as The Universe would have it - I got thrown into a whirl wind of things not going my way. Rule after rule shutting me down. Alas, there was nothing I could to rent a car or borrow a car from a friend. I had to find another way. 

Needless to say, at this point (around 1:45 pm) I was irritated, frustrated, upset, hopeless & yet, still determined. 

I managed to work something out with my roommates (who were flying into San Francisco the Wednesday) to pick us up & take us to Tahoe with them - it wasn't what I had planned. But it worked out with just a shift in plans. 

Monday - money
Soon there after, another tidal wave came crashing down on me. We didn't have enough money put away to go on the trip. I thought I had taken the necessary steps. I thought I did what I needed to do to make sure we were covered. But somewhere along the way, the money disappeared. 

I was moments away from canceling the trip until The Mister said you should call Stevi & see what she has to say.

Crying, upset, sad, irritated & at a loss, I called Stevi. I explained the situation & said I didn't know what to do. She said if you could wave a magic wand and have however much you need to make the trip work, how much would you need? I put a number out there and she okay - I'll let you borrow it. & just like that, the trip was back on. 

The aftermath 
I got off the phone with Stevi & went into the living room smiling & shared the story with the Mister. He said yay. I knew it would all work out. 

I looked back at my Monday of emotional ups and down (something I rarely experience) and then remembered that the night before I layed in bed, surrendering my life to God. 

Monday morning he started working his miracles and I slammed on the breaks not realizing I had asked for all of this. 

Surrendering does not mean giving up. 

Surrendering means you want something bigger and greater. Something you know is unachievable alone. I don't know what The Universe has planned for this trip - but I do know there is purpose, reason & magic. 

I completely trust that this is all part of a bigger plan to make our honeymoon as magical as possible & for that I am grateful. 

Okay, Universe- I hear you. 

Letting go now,
Megan

This morning I had planned on going to my Soul Sister's meetup SacredSexyBiz by Lisa Carmen - we were going to be talking about manifesting our dreams. 

I was looking forward to diving into the topic & meeting up with yet another Soul Sister - the fabulous, Jen Land (who I met through ROOTED the eCourse in May). 

But as timing would have it - I choose not to invest my time money into the event at this moment seeing as though we are heading to Lake Tahoe in less than a week. 

When I called Jen to share the disappointing news the most miraculous thing happened...

First, she offered to pay for my lunch & said I could catch her on the flip side. 

She musted have sensed that I still had some hesitation around saying YES! - so she said in the most genuinely, loving tone with complete sincerity, 

I mean WHOA. I can't remember the last time I called to cancel something & didn't feel an overwhelming sense of guilt or sadness.

Jen gave me the space to make my own choice. To choose what is best for me - no strings attached to her own personal experience. 

It was a sensational moment for me & our newly founded friendship, to say the least. We ended the conversation with no decision made & an I love you. 

I feel so blessed. 

I want you to think about your relationships. When you have plans with someone & they get switched around, do honor what is best for your friend in the situation or your own desires? 

For me personally, my first reaction is about what I want & how sad I am that it's not going my way. 

But after being slapped in the face with love & kindness from Jen today & experiencing how good it felt to be supported in what was best for me - free of the guilt trip, apologizing, etc. 

I can't imagine offering the people in my life anything else. 

This is me committing to put the inidividuals best interest before my own. What a profound way of being. 

Thank you Jen for sharing this new lease on life - for whatever reason it hadn't occurred to me this powerfully before. 

I appreciate you giving me the space to experience what uncondtional love & support look like in a friendship.

This post is brought to you from @FreeSpiritKnits

The intention for this e-course is to inspire all of you mothers, mothers-to-be, or even those of you who think you may want to become a mother someday.  This course is about mindful mothering.  It will invite you to connect more deeply to your intuition while nurturing your children and yourself.  It's about listening more intently to your heart center and celebrating YOU as a mother.  It's about building your inner strength so you can continue to mother from within - the place that is all-knowing and comes from love - while you release and let go of self-doubt, and the need to seek external approval or validation. And you'll do all of this while enriching your creativity and making art with your children.

So often we as mothers put our needs last and we all know where that gets us over time, right?  Downright exhausted, frustrated, resentful, sad, overwhelmed, confused, lost... NOW is the time to take better care of our mind, body, and spirits as mothers.  If we don't put ourselves first, then who will?  If we don't listen to our hearts and let our hidden dreams take flight, then will they ever come to be?

If we, as mothers, continue to put our needs, desires and dreams last, then what kind of message is that sending our children?  Since children learn best by example, wouldn't it be a great lesson in self-worth if we took the time to build our own courage and inner-strength?  Wouldn't it be an amazing gift to our children if we teach them how to be confident, courageous, creative beings - ones that follow their own hearts and discover their life purpose and truly live a happy, fulfilled, vibrant life?

Of course that's what we all want for our children.  Yet if we continue letting our own dreams collect dust, then what messages, even on a sub conscious level, are we passing on to our little ones?

When I say put ourselves first, I am NOT saying you shouldn't take care of your children's needs!  Of course creating attachment, loving unconditionally and keeping our children safe is our job and our priority.  Being a mother of two small children I know how hard this job is. (Rewarding?  Yes!  But a very hard, tiring job for sure.)  And if I don't carve out time for my personal wellness and creative needs, then it's obvious I'm not living in balance - because everything just starts to fall apart.

So as I fumble and practice and try, try again, I'm learning how to honor my own needs for creative self-expression while I raise my two little boys.  I'm learning how to listen to the whispers of my soul, how to manifest my personal dreams and how to let them fly NOW, rather than wait until the kids are grown.  And I've built confidence in my ability to listen to my heart while mothering.  I'm learning how to really listen to my intuition and to do whatfeels right for my kids, rather than just doing something because that's how "they," the doctors, the sleep books, the experts, other mothers say I should be doing it.  And I'm excited to learn, share and grow with all of you moms or moms-to-be who are passionate about mothering with heart, too.Mark your calendars for a 7-week creative e-course experience where you will get to make art with and alongside your children, while at the same time be inspired to dig deeper into your heart and pull out what's ready to manifest.  You will build strength in your innate abilities to mother, enrich your creativity, and embrace your inner wisdom, beauty and joy...

Why am I making this class?
Because as a second time mother I've been reminded of just how confused I was when I became a mom.  I read every baby book imaginable.  I talked to every doctor, child development expert, seasoned mothers... Not only did I doubt myself as a mother, but also I fell into a bad habit of putting my needs last.  After many months of tears and exhaustion finally something clicked and I saw profound shifts taking place in my life.  I started listening to my own heart when things just didn't feel quite right.  And the more I did that, the more I began to mother from within, and stopped looking for validation and approval from everyone else "out there."  

I see so many moms (of children of all ages) who are struggling.  Struggling to find balance. Struggling to find joy.  Struggling to find sleep.  Struggling to keep things clean. Struggling to find themselves among the craziness of family life.  Struggling to find meaning.  Struggling to find time or the energy to be creative. Struggling to hear the desires in their hearts.  Struggling to fit into their old pants.  Struggling to accept the gray hairs and the age lines.  Struggling to let go.  Struggling to slow-down.  Struggling to let themselves be something other than "mom." (I know these struggles from first-hand experience!)

Somewhere we adopt beliefs that allow us to put our dreams last, to run ourselves ragged, to live a stress-filled, activity-filled life, to stop listening to our heart, and to keep on going, day-after-day with a smile and make-up on our face.  And I'm here saying enough is enough.  Let's raise our children the way we feel is best for them and best for us.  And let's make sure we are taking care of our own personal health, creativity and wellness along the way.

I feel creativity is the gateway to our intuition and intuition is the key when it comes to mindful mothering.  And so I introduce to you my newest baby, my e-course experience.

To win a spot in this new course, take a moment to leave a comment on Shannon's blog HERE post to one of the questions below, by Friday, June 24th.  Join my Facebook page, or sign up for my newsletter, or send out a tweet about this post to be entered a second, third or fourth time.

Thank you for sharing this with all the mothers in your life!  I look forward to sharing this e-course experience with you! (More details to come.)

Your Personal Reflection:  What does Mothering With Heart mean to you?  What do you find hard to balance in your life?  What creative dream or inner yearning, in you, is waiting to be born?

I have some good news & some bad news. 

(Shared with me from Mali of The Soulmate Experience)

I have friend who I have known for more than 6 years. For the majority of our relationship we spoke several times a week, if not daily. We supported one another with everything we were going through, the good and the bad. The nice and the ugly. The fun stuff and the tear-jerkers. 

& then, as if black magic took action - the relationship that I had grown to love,  vanished into thin air. 

I miss her. I still love her & mostly - I just don't understand. 

Of course there are cirrcumstances that play into this senario - but I don't want to put an emphasis on the story. 

The story is where the heartache lives. The story is where us humans (myself included) tend to get carried away. 

At this moment, I have no solid grasp on exactly what it is I am to learn from this separation. But I do know that in every struggle there is something to learn. Something for our character to gain. & if this is true. 

Then this life-lesson is gonna be a WHOPPER for me! 

So I extend the invitation to you. 

What is available for you to learn there? What can you learn about yourself in this situation instead of pointing the finger? Try it out. Share. 

& I will do the same. 

I really enjoy looking back to the exact date a year from now to see where my journey has taken me. 

As I've gotten older it seems that time passes by much quicker. 

A year can come & goes before we know it. 

On this Wealthy Monday what leaves me feeling most abundant are the relationships I've formed in my life. 

On Saturday I went to A Day Away Retreat (again!) & hung out with some ladies & gentlemen that have only come into my life with in the last year or so. 

Now I consider some of them to be my very good friends & mentors. 

I love the surprises life brings us - the good & the bad - because they both lead to something great. 

"In the end, it's always okay. If it's not okay, then it's not the end." & I really trust in that. 

Thank you Lisa Carmen, Matt Bowers, Ruby Teets & Michael Carreiro for being part of the inspiration in my life. 

My relationship with you all leaves me feeling TOTALLY wealthy & abundant. 

What leaves you feel abundantly wealthy this Monday?

I know you've heard it before, but it's true - nothing else matters or exists at any given time, other than this moment. This statement can be especially valuable in our relationships. 

It's more common than not, & much easier to move from a space of what was, wasn't or has been than what is NOW in any relationship. 

Much of how we react & respond to our partners can be from a place of what happened days, weeks, moments, months -even YEARS ago instead of what is true for us in this moment. 

Thinking of how to respond differently can be overwhelming & sometimes seem impossible to say the least. Especially when we have been doing it one way our entire lives. 

I want you take a moment to try out this idea. 
From my experience moving from a place of intention creates magic. Where as moving from a place of past creates turbulence. 

Choose an intention for your relationship (romantic, friendships, family, co-workers, anyone & everyone) & allow the magic to show up in your lives. 

Here are a few examples to look at:

• I am open & willing to see my partner through the energy & love of The Universe instead of my own judgement critisism. 
  
• The intention & purpose of our being together is to give, have & be love. To experience it on every level with one another. Inside & out. 
  
• My soul-purpose for being committed to our relationship is to inspire others & each other to be the very best version of ourselves. 
  

You don't have to stay with one intention or have your intention be a full sentence. You can choose a different one each morning when you wake up if that catches your fancy! 

You can also have the your combine intention be something like love, passion or integrity. The only important factor is that the choosen intention lights your internal flame & makes you come alive with excitement. 

The next time you feel the pressure of a relationship weighing down on you, check in with yourself & ask if you are moving from the past or from the current space of intention? 

Allow the weight to lift & the magic to take its place. 

Want a little more magic in your life? 
Get some Soul Lovin'

When you visit A Day Away Retreat in Boyd, Texas, (where we had our wedding) you get treated like a Queen (unless of course you are a King). 

I ate my first whole salad there & truly enjoyed it. I had homemade bread, fruit covered in a vanilla cream sauce, homemade pizza (yes, even the dough), Havarti eggs & so much more.

Are you hungry now?

By the time I left & arrived back home good, healthy food was calling my name much louder than the bad-for-me food I am accustomed to eating. Last night I made a healthy dinner & wanted to share with with you.

Salad

• Spinach
  
• Feta Cheese
  
• Almonds (sliced if you can find them)
  
• Kraft Green Goddess Dressing
  

Goulash

• Gluten free pasta
  
• Ground Turkey
  
• 2 Squash
  
• 2 Zucchini 
  
• 1 Can of Stewed Tomatoes
  
• 1 Can of Tomato Sauces
  
• 1 Can of Whole Kernel Corn
  
• 2 Small Cans of Tomato Paste
  
• Salt 
  
• Pepper
  
• Chili Powder 
  
• Garlic Powder
  

Directions

1. Cook gluten free pasta
   
2. Brown the ground turkey. Drain the grease. 
   
3. Blend the zucchini, squash, stewed tomatoes, tomato sauce, & tomato paste together. (The Mister doesn't like a lot of veggies - but if he can’t see them or feel the texture - he never knows they are there! If you like chunky veggies in your food - blending isn't necessary.) 
   
4. Mix all of the ingredients together (including the corn).
   
5. Use spices to season to taste. 
   

Enjoy! This was enough for 4 people to eat & have left overs. But for me, anything with a tomato sauce tastes better reheated. I am looking forward to lunch today!

I don’t even know where to begin my story. The closer my wedding day came, the clearer of a vision I had for what I wanted it to look & feel like - for myself & others.

I woke up Saturday morning at A Day Away Retreat Center with one of my BFFs, Lacy. Later in the day some more friends & family joined us. After we spent a couple of hours setting up the decor - we had a pool party. We drank beers, swam, laughed & enjoyed each others company.

I can honestly say the only nerves I experienced were in the last hour of waiting to walk down the isle. About 20 minutes before it was time for the show to begin - my Mom & Dad walk in the room with 3 shots of Jager Bombs & we throw back. It was awesome.

10 minutes til, the minister- the beautiful Lisa Carmen comes in & we stand holding hands in a circle, the flower girl, my sister, the photographer & myself - breathing & grounding. It was beautiful.

2 minutes til, everyone is in their seats outside. The flower girl, my sister, my Dad & myself were standing at the door getting ready to walk down the isle. 

My Dad has tears in his eyes - I can’t look at him or I’ll start to cry. Then we walk. The moment I stepped out of the door is was as if I stepped into another dimension where everything was coaxed in beautiful orange sunlight & there was nothing that existed except love. 

When I got to the alter - it was just me & Brawn. The rest of the world seemed to fall away. The vows were perfect. No religion, just love. We spoke of God - but in a Universal sense so everyone felt connected to the verses. 

& just like that - as if in the blink of an eye - it was over. I would be lying if I didn’t say I kind of want to push the rewind button and do it one more time & bottle up a piece of that magic.

There was laughter. 

There were tears. 

There were smiles, hugs, & I love you’s. 

I can honestly say that it was the most magical experience I’ve ever had & it FAR surpassed any expectation I might of had for the experience. 

No stress. 

No rehersal. 

No big budget. 

I want to give thanks to all of our friends & family. We couldn’t have done this without your love & support - it meant SO much to me for those of you who came. & to log on to Facebook & Twitter to see over 60 happy wishes & congratulations just added to the magic of my day. You all are a blessing to us, & I won’t forget it. 

Namaste. Let this new chapter begin!

Note: there will be more pictures coming when I get them back from the photographer - this are the ones friends have shared so far.